I had a West Wing dream last night. I chalk it up to being somewhat excited about the debate tonight, just watching the previous debate and having an inexplicable fondness for The West Wing tv show.

My episode only went as far as the credit sequence and had all the crazy inaccuracies of a dream. I wrote it out as quick as I could this morning…apologies to Aaron Sorkin. To help get you in the mood, here’s the West Wing Suite. Enjoy.

                                     THE WEST WING

                                  "I heard the blues"

                                        TEASER

            FADE IN:

            INT. PRESIDENTIAL SECRETARY'S OFFICE - MORNING

            A big, sloppy mess sits on the floor in front of the entrance to
            the oval office. Instead of the threadbare carpet normally
            present there is marble tile under what looks like a cherry
            Slurpee.

            Saturday morning. Light staff day. DEBORAH FIDERER, President's
            secretary, is wearing a sweatshirt and tugs on her ever-present
            lollipop.

            Voices from around the corner appear as DONNA MOSS and CHARLIE
            YOUNG. Charlie carries a dime-store sponge mop.

                                DONNA
                      I'm sorry. You know I'm not
                      capable of doing something even
                      slightly mean.

                                CHARLIE
                      I'm only disappointed that all we
                      had was this mop with a pitiful
                      sponge at the end.

                                DEBORAH
                      Is she still trying to apologize?

                                DONNA
                      The swinging of my arm couldn't
                      have been anything but an
                      accident.

            CHARLIE pushes a sponge mop across the tile. He's amassing a
            rift of what looks like a flow of cool-aid while picking up hair
            and other debris --but mostly just lots of hair.

                                CHARLIE
                      I'm a rag mop man, myself.

                                DONNA
                      My point is that I didn't want
                      you to think I did it on purpose.

                                DEBORAH
                      You kids behave while I run these
                      documents down to the, well,
                      choose your favorite acronym.

            FIDERER leaves the room.

                                CHARLIE
                      Since when have we lost sight of
                      what's really important around
                      here?

            A PHONE on FIDERER'S desk rings.

                                DONNA
                      You mean the civility of man to
                      not act on aggression?

                                CHARLIE
                      I want to know when we've stopped
                      buying mops and started
                      purchasing these awful sponges on
                      a stick.

            J. CURTIS, who has not appeared anywhere in this scene before,
            magically appears only to watch the mopping and to answer the
            PHONE.

                                J.
                          (answering)
                      Oval Office of the President.

            A raspy female voice on the other end of the line --very old and
            feeble. In the background is music being played and the sounds
            of a bar.

                                VOICE
                      Mr. President, my husband needs
                      you. He's...(cough)

                                J.
                          (stammering)
                      I'm, I, uh...this isn't the
                      President.

                                VOICE
                      Today is his birthday. He's 93
                      and plays the guitar.

            J. realizes he has picked up the wrong phone call. The music in
            the background is getting louder.

                                J.
                          (to Charlie and Donna)
                      Who calls this number?

            J's face is sheer panic.

                                CHARLIE
                      All the calls route through the
                      White House switchboard.

            Donna looks at the phone, at the line now active.

                                DONNA
                      That number, that line, is only
                      given to members of Congress.

                                J.
                          (to Donna)
                      I think we're going to need some
                      help.

                                VOICE
                      He's going to keep playing until
                      he dies.

            The music is reaching a fever pitch in the background. Someone
            is really wailing on the guitar.

                                J.
                      Get me everybody.

                                                              SMASH CUT TO:

            MAIN TITLES.

                                  END OF TEASER

(addendum: And, if you’re interested in reading something Aaron Sorkin *did* write about this election year, check out this NYT article.)